Recently, I realized the importance of difficult, even painful conversations. It was during a conflict coaching session with a young couple, who were living together, along with their baby. The woman had contacted me for couples coaching with the goal of developing effective communication during heated disagreements. During the coaching session, the man seemed hesitant to engage in the current situation, while expressing a need for dramatic change. It was as if he was holding back but yet seemingly wanting to say more. He said that he did not want to hurt her a couple of times. I asked, “Hurt her about what?”. The man divulged that he did not want to continue to live her and did not love her. The woman, blindsided, wept and expressed regret. As the coaching session evolved, she expressed appreciation for her partner’s honesty and for not dragging out a disingenuous relationship. The coaching discussion moved to living arrangement options. Couples coaching can help partners delve deeply into the muck, bring forth unforeseen issues to be addressed and allow people to see more clearly their future.
